my.BEAUTIFUL DISASTER...

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

UPDATES ABOUT MY.... LIFE?!

if u call this .. LIFE.. then i really have nothing much to say other than my daily dose of high-ness during dinner time and hanging out time aka sharing session with ivan and alex. i really really wanna update my blog about my life in london but first.. im too busy to even update and second i have STM which means... i really cant rmb things that happened other than... perhaps more significant ones like fire alarms* =P. seriously i think im suffering from bipolar nature or smthg. i can be super high at one moment and super depressed at the next moment. like.. what the toot right. yea. dunno why. not really because of ahem. but.. i don think its 100% not because of him... somehow... i think my weird feeling has smthg more to it than jus ahem.

yea. so basically, life has been not veryyy good neither isit veryyy bad! jus average i guess. and the only thing that makes me wanna go back for bankside dinners is really ahem and ahem only plus company of alex and ivan. so yea. and seriously... i think... the song 走火入魔 and 触电 super describes me when i see ahem. seriously. i think im slightly... over the line. and gg abit off tangent. i know i must come back to reality. i know... but how? i want to. i don wanna get hurt or like.. feel emo abt something so trivial and silly. cos in the first place, i dun even know ahem! so as wad ivan says.. not even level 1 frens.. so .. how? oh well. for me. i think i always take the sit and wait and wish approach. which shud be so for girls.... so yea let fate do the job. PLUS! i must stop all these crazinesss now. gonna miss bankside dinner for two nights and he's nt in for friday night so.. this week is pretty much quite dull.. yea.. then again. maybe God's trying to tell me smthg... maybe... he's jus not for me. or........... maybe...... im simply thinking too much. idk. i don wanna know seriously.

oh gosh.. if i ever write out my true true feelings here... abt stuff that happened i think all my frens would think im crazy! and truthfully.. i need an outlet to vent my so called emo-ness and highness so that i attain balance again.. scary right. i know i am. but i also dunno why im like that. trying v hard to control. but alex says.. controlling is bad. so.. yeah. i guess... let it FADE.. hopefully it will go away soon. i keep telling myself to go for dinner at later time so wont bang into him. wont see him then wont have such after effects. but it always doesnt seem to work. idk. shud i? i need advice.

i guess. this is one of the more truthful entries ive ever written. and hey tmr or rather today for sg my DARLING IS COMING!!! hahah!!! hopefully jess sis and jx can help me! but if cant its ok la! but hey im listenin to darling's song now! so im suddenly happy... but just now i really felt darn emo.. but cant describe what's that weird empty emotion inside... ohwell. let it pass.

yay! 3 weeks to BACK TO SG! ... supposed to be damn damn happy but..... the thought that im gg to miss bankside dinners for 3weeks plus is making me emo.. oh sheesh jus a second ago i jus said im NOT GG TO THINK ABT AHEM AND HECK ABT EVERYTHING! and nowwww u see la! i'm dead. im seriously dead. gosh. help me.

~sukai

my.BEAUTIFUL DISASTER... ;

Friday, November 14, 2008

ITS BEEN A LONG TIME BUT AHLAN WASALAN PEOPLE!

yes! that's arabic and it means "hello" haha! life has been sooo much fun and pain cos im pathetically sick. had fever down to 39deg but it subsided... yet my cough is getting worse. oh well. all these moaning and cries for pity aside, im totally ENJOYINGGGGG LIFE AND ENJOYING STUDIES! although stuff are getting harder and work is piling up as aways... but since i realised ive been neglecting this bloggie... im back! jus for a quick update.

first, i had a brilliant weekend at wales with people from all around UK! AIESEC maxis conference rawked altho we had gross food and cold showers. literally i was shivering from inside out.. the weather was Colldddd. but AIESEC LSE bonded really well and i was quite glad that i went too altho some talks quite rubbish but hey u guys if u really need inspiration should go google marcus orlovsky! his speech was SOO MR BEAN YET VERY VERY INSPIRING. i think i learnt alot frm his talk... and laffed like mad. lols! anyway! wales was good! some photos!

florian, alexandra, me, meimei(huizhen), savi, jagriti

jump shot with formal dress can!!!! im flying!

okayy then recapp back abit.. it was fresher's ball... hahaha and camped over at meimei's place for overnight bridge. lols over the morning until 4am. damn shiokkk but tired. yawwwn.

sichen and me!

And finally this photo is taken in my room with ivan who is such a darling mother. i was sick for the past few days he ran in the rain to get me 4 bottles of 2l of water. crazy man but hey I LOVE HIM. our darling best mother ever! hahaha. and.... the day b4.. i had fever he wanted buy food up for me. and bought food medicine and water... gosh. so sweet. thanks mum!

Econs reception!

ice cream with alicia!

CHEERS MAN to everyone ive met(other than this scary guy who stalks me). ahah. and i met one super cute eyecandy also from my hall. he's jus. CUTE. SHUAI and.. mmm... nice. but he's postgrad.. which means he's old.. oh man.. sob heartbroken. hahhaaaaa! and i cant stop talking abt him! oh sheesh. >.<>

okayy time for bathe and work! cyaaa guys

~sukai

my.BEAUTIFUL DISASTER... ;